


Let Me Go.

by Toxic_Astin



Category: Original Work
Genre: Abusive Relationships, Domestic Violence, Gen, M/M, Manipulation, Sex Addiction
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-18
Updated: 2017-02-18
Packaged: 2018-09-25 10:20:13
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,564
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9815423
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Toxic_Astin/pseuds/Toxic_Astin
Summary: You know I'll never have the courage to do it on my own, so why won't you do it?





	

**Author's Note:**

> Hey guys! I decided to post this because I'm honestly proud of what I wrote. The OCs don't belong to me, but to my boyfriend and his best friend. Just thought I'd let you know! I'd like to add that I do not mean to glorify or normalize abusive relationships.

I couldn't handle it anymore. His voice, the death glares he'd give me whenever our eyes met, the way he'd clench his fists everytime I'd say something he didn't like. I could feel my arms and legs tremble each time I heard all the insults he was throwing at me, ignoring all the tears I was crying. Sitting on my chair in front of the table, I was looking down, afraid to see his furious glaze again. My stomach was hurting. I wanted to trow up.

I knew I deserved this scolding though. For unknown reasons, Grim had refused to have sex for the fourth time this week, and my body just couldn't handle it. My addiction had once again taken over, and as soon as my partner had fallen asleep, I had sneaked out of the house to go to the nearest club and have a one night stand with a stranger. When I came back with messy clothes, unkempt hair and smelling like vodka, Grim had guessed what I had done. After a few minutes, all of the hickies my temporary partner had left on my neck had been replaced by bruises from my loved one, and my bite marks had gotten bloody all over again. And now there I was, as he kept telling me how ungrateful I was. _After all the things I did for you, this is how you thank me!_. I didn't have the strength to talk back : besides, my body was damaged enough, I didn't want him to hurt me anymore, even though I knew I would end up saying something that would piss him off again. It's always been this way : he would yell at me, I would defend myself, end up regretting it, and he would touch me inappropriately until I'd let my needs give in. I'd let him take me, and suddenly he'd love me again, apologize for being so violent, and for a few days it would feel like heaven.

"Wes, are you listening to me?!" Grim suddenly yelled, grabbing my chin to make me look up at him.

"I-I'm sorry... I couldn't help myself..." I only whimpered. Normally, I'd try and explain the same thing over and over : _It's an addiction, I need it you asshole!_ But like I said earlier, I was already too weak. For now all I wanted tonight was to keep a low profile and wait until he'd stop yelling. Then I'd go to the bathroom and take a shower, wash out all the blood I had left. Then I'd go to bed and try to remember that _at one point in my life_ , Grim used to be the most loving boyfriend I ever had. We used to hate each other, but something had sparked between us and Grim was ready to do anything to see me smile. He was so sweet. _Stop frowning, you look much more attractive with a smile._ It might sound creepy to you, but to me it was a proof that deep down, I was more than an unloveable freak to him.

"Is that all you're going to say? With all the time you spend cheating on me and having sex with strangers, I thought you'd come up with better excuses!" Grim snarled. He grabbed a fistful of my hair and pulled on it, forcing me to get up as I let out a pained whine. "I have to put up with your shit everyday, Wes, because I always think I can make you a better person. But you're hopeless! You're just a fucking sex toy, and the worst part is that you think that calling it a disorder is gonna change anything! Well, "addiction" or not, you're still a fucking slut to me!"

My knees gave in and I fell on the floor, hissing because Grim was still firmly holding my hair. He growled and let got, noticing that I wouldn't answer, and suddenly kicked me in the ribs. With a yelp, I quickly curled in a ball and began sobbing loudly. I just wanted tonight to be over. Please.

"I love you Grim!" I heard myself whimper. I felt bad for it, but I still loved him. After all, when he would have sex with me, he was the one who helped me with my needs. He was right : I was being ungrateful. I was such an idiot for using my addiction as a way to cheat on him. That's how it was, right? The others never tried defending me when he was around, so he was probably only saying the truth. Maybe I was just a whore who was too ashamed to admit it.

I suddenly stood up and took off running with my remaining strength. I began heading to the stairs and walked the up the first steps. Halfway there, I suddenly felt something grabbing my ankle and harshly pull on it. I screamed and immediately fell down, my chin violently hitting the edge of the step above me. I had cut my tongue in the process, my mouth now tasting like blood. I looked behind me : obviously it was Grim who had stopped me. I moved my head against the stairs I was now facing and started crying again. My entire body was shaking and so was my voice.

"P-Please d-don't h-hurt me Grim... I-I can't move anymore..." When I spoke, I also noticed that my voice was rusty and it was a pain in the ass to speak loud enough for him to hear. But he heard, and growled. I managed to stand up and made my way upstairs, too tired to run now. I didn't want to look back, I was too scared to see him chasing me again.

I walked to my room, closed the door and sat on the bed. I curled up and hid my face. I didn't want to go to the bathroom, not yet. For now I needed some time to calm down, or else I knew I'd end up trying something stupid. I tensed up when I heard the door open slowly. Come on Wes, look up. He isn't done yet. Grim looked at me and let out a disappointed sigh.

"You know I won't always be there, Wes. One day I'll get tired of your stupid lies and excuses, and I'll leave you. You'll have to deal with your bullshit by yourself, and you'll miss me. Do you want that, Wes?"

God, please Grim. Leave. Dump me, break up with me, end this poisonous relationship. You know I'll never have the courage to do it on my own, so why won't you do it? He suddenly walked to me, and I flinched, thinking he was about to hurt me again. Instead, he wrapped his arms around my shoulders and pressed his lips against my cheek. He sat down next to me and pulled me in his lap. I rested my forehead against his neck while he began petting my hair gently.

"I love you..." I whispered as I began tracing random circles on Grim's back. "I know I don't show it but I love you, Grim..."

"I love you too, Wes... I hope you're not mad at me." He replied with a soft voice. I wasn't mad. Not at him at least. I was mad at myself for loving Grim. For not being able to escape. For being so weak.

"I'm... I'm not mad... Never."

His other hand moved under my shirt and brushed my back, making me shiver slightly. I looked up at him again : he licked his lips and pecked my lips several times. I closed my eyes and focused on the feeling of our lips touching softly. His kisses suddenly moved to my jawline and my neck, and I gasped everytime. Were we going to do it again? I let out a shy moan when his hand moved to squeeze and grope my ass. He began rolling his hips, to which I did the same in response. My body suddenly began burning, but I let out a pathetic whine once he removed his hands and pushed me back on the bed. I looked at him and sniffled.

"Sorry Wes, but with what you've done today, I don't think I'm up for it." Grim explained as he stood up. "I'll go to bed and sleep. Go take a shower, you smell like alcohol and sex."

I looked down and nodded. "Alright. I love you, Grim."

"I love you too." Grim said before leaving and closing the door behind him. Now I was back to being alone. I couldn't tell if everything was silent, or if I had suddenly gone deaf. I stood up, but winced and quickly sat back once I felt how badly my body was hurting. I laid down on my side and curled up into a ball, waiting to fall asleep. My tears kept running down, burning my cheeks. I suddenly thought of Grim telling me he loved me and how softly he held me earlier, and I smiled. Yes. Despite all that, I still loved him. I would never get away from him, and it was all my fault.

I couldn't handle it anymore. His voice, the death glares he'd give me whenever our eyes met, the way he'd clench his fists everytime I'd say something he didn't like. But I loved him.

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you guys enjoyed it! I'd like to apologize for any possible typos and errors. English isn't my first language!


End file.
